Day 44 & day 45 :)

JETT

Wow! I am so amazed at my little Jett Plane's strength. Yesterday, 2 days post op, he was able to be brought down on his ventilation pressure and oxygen.. I am amazed that he has recovered so well from what was a huge operation.

The biggest event yesterday was he had a bed change (Yay he's back to sleeping on his own sheets!) He didn't handle that too well, having a brady and his oxygen saturation went down to the 40's.. My Amazing Jett recovered very quickly though as soon as he settled and was back to 25% oxygen.

The Dr's had taken a sample of what was coming out of the drain in his abscess. The results came back that he has a staph infection :(.. His blood cultures are still negative though, so no blood stream infection, and by the results of his bloods Dr D said it looks like we are staying on top of the infection. They have changed his antibiotics so now he is on Gentamicin, meropenum & one more which I forget the name of.. I'll ask again.. It's Fluclox :)

Dr D was so surprised to see Jett had a staph infection, rather than a typical gut bug.. She said Jett certainly is full of surprises and "Beats to his own drum" I thought that was cute and it certainly is true.

I am looking for Jett to stable enough for a cuddle on the twins birthday. Dr D thinks it is on the cards, but it wont be a long cuddle and no skin to skin cos he can't be on his tummy.. Thats ok though.. Any cuddle is better than no cuddle.

He is still on morph and medaz for pain, but he has weaned off 1 of his BP meds and the other is really low dose :)

Today Jett has continued being great. His pip has been reduced to 20 :) He was on room air (21% oxygen) for a bit today, but had to go back up to 25%. That's still so good though. He has low HB so will probably have a blood transfusion soon. He had albumin yesterday and he is on lasix twice daily.. I didn't want him moved yesterday so the beautiful Clinical Nurse Consultant spoke to me and kept us in the private room. It is good in there, we have lots of space. Bub is still in an open cot with glad wrap as a blanket to keep the heat in :)

When he is doing so well, I feel positive, but no amount of strength or time can unstick his gut. We just have to hope and pray this baby gets strong enough for another surgery and he has enough live gut to form a stoma. This baby has to come home..

MUMMY

Exhausted, on auto pilot. Swinging between feeling positive and telling Jett he has to come home, to silently planning his funeral. It's awful. I hate this, I hate that this is my reality. I hate that so many people take their babes for granted. Jett is so amazing, but there are no guarantees. I need to focus on the moment, but it's hard.. Especially with the twins birthday so close. I can't believe they died in this very hospital. Jett HAS to make it. I don't know how I'll be able to function in daily life without him. Jett is my last chance at being a Mama to a living baby. This is not how my story ends. it just can't be.

ETA: I just came back from the hospital and my babies blood gas allowed his ventilation to be weaned AGAIN :) Pip is now 18 :).. HB is 93 so may not a transfusion just yet :). My heart almosts bursts with love everytime I see him :) I'm so proud of him, and his brothers.. I am thinking they are helping him :)